As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
If relationships were based on ego stroking and meaningless sex, we'd be soulmates
yea i came on her face and told her to bring a snorkel next time
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He texted back and said he would hook up if he didn't have a test at 8am. It's really hard to be annoyed by how good of a student he is.
Yeah that sucks. That's why I stick to deadbeat sports management majors.
Who knew drunk me could climb a 17 story building for apple juice and sex
I can't. Currently naked covered in Nair trying desperately to catch his cat that rubbed up on my leg.
I hate that cat.
i made the walk of shame wearing her booty shorts that said juicy on the back. i'm still counting it as a good night
He got an erection from helping me mobilize my lumbar spine. I love physical therapy school.
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Once the overwhelming "oh god my crotch is on fire" wears off, that excite stuff is really nice
They were out of watermelon smirnoff, so we got you a fifth of 5 o'clock and an actual watermelon.
Turns out dignity is priceless and Plan B costs $41.09
Chasing shots with airborne.. Gonna get rid of my sickness and my soberness.
Because, after all, nothing quite says life in 2020 than doing laundry at 9:40 on a Friday morning to make sure you have masks and underwear.
This is the weekend we were supposed to be in Vegas making bad decisions hoping no one got VD, not stuck at home for the 900th day in a row
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