There is a man walking 2 goats through the city.
Bonus: only one of them was on a leash.
Let's bang like we're on a Lifetime Channel movie.
I'll let you put expensive food in me, but really, not much else.
honestly, magaritas are the void men can't fill.
i have this theory that all the people in the world who dont like mayonnaise had very bad encounter with jizz once
She was so loose she sounded like a jar of salsa. I didn't know that was even possible.
You bit the bartender when he refused to poor rum in your purse and hand you a straw.
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
He just told me that when we were doing it I told him I was the captain and he was the boat. Im too embarassed to ask for money for a cab.
It was fine until they started lighting shots of everclear on fire and making ME take them. That's when shit went down...
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
sooo the guy I beat last night in strip pong is the manager's husband at my new job...
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
You used your chihuahua as a pillow screaming "HE'S A PILLOW AND A PET" and proceeded to puke in the dog bed
He's so sweet...I can't see him enjoying that I got injured during sex.