i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
it was the least impressive dick i've ever seen... and i've changed babies' diapers.
My penis hasn't been this frustrated since I was like 13 and I awkwardly got boners at school dances
I need to stop taking drags of other peoples cigarettes, it's such a tease. Like playing just the tip, you just can't
She calls me Shortcake and bites my ear. Trust me, I'm FINE with bein the secret lesbian lover.
I feel like someone kicked me repeatedly in the ribs. I don't think sex is supposed to do that.
That's the point dumbass, I can't use my boss as a reference cause they'd have to fucking call him in prison.
I would rather get explosive diarrhea at the aquarium than go home alone tonight
Body paints and jello. Your canvas awaits
Another sexterpiece awaits
But in fairness, I would totally have a robo-penis as long as it had full sensation.
the straight edge chick smoked with me, because according to her my bowl is pretty
First. I had the strength. Now. I am the death.
you know my pussy doesn't know between good and evil
I’m a lady. I promise I won’t oogle your junk when we go skinny dipping.
On this version of “Dean Can’t Be a Normal Fucking Human,” I told a guy I’d shove a tv up his ass. Recreationally.
Plasma, LED or OLED?
Randomize
