Fuck. sleeping in my sisters room again I heard zombie noises outside my window
Just heard a guy on the phone saying " ya ill buy the eight ball " then came to my register to ask what asile the sugar substitute is on.
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
we just got kicked out of the mexican restaurant. i have a full pitcher of margarita's hiding under my coat.
The last thing I remember is pushing my way into the bathroom and dumping a 40 on him. We havent talked since.
I'll come out for a little. I can't be visibly hungover at work again or I get written up and fired. And yes, I am aware of how alcoholic that sounds.
Eric was just sitting there open-mouthed swallowing sake from that squirt bottle for so long the lady across from us leaned over to her kid and told him not to end up like "the big alcoholic one"
Remember that time we turned a can of Axe body spray into a flame thrower?
You should just construct a mini-city, actually. Then destroy, photograph and post. Who could turn down a dick that conquered a whole city? Craigslist personals wont know what hit it.
I just did a walk of shame on my own block. one of the old neighbors saw and greeted me "good morning, girl next door"
Just leave a note saying "riding dick see you in the mornig"
Alcohol won't break your heart. I mean, unless it's all gone maybe
You know tonight's gonna be a good night when your already planning on sleeping in a trunk
You told everyone to shut up then told the officer that you are 21 when you drink.
We could just stay sober.
No! We tried that once.
It sucked.
Randomize
