what kind of dress can i wear to my high school reunion that says "even though i'm more successful than all of you i'm still up for sex"?
She sucked my dick when I had a concussion. It was the coolest feeling ever but the doctor said it was a bad idea. He's obviously gay.
Fuck. These are the symptoms I had when I was pregnant. This could be bad.
Escaped ambulance. Meet me at your apartment.
She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.
Wow way to turn my death into an oppurtunity to get laid
Her mom offered to give me a lap dance. I was a guest, I couldn't say no.
Was I holding a cat when you saw me? Because that was the height of that party for me.
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
A little sexual choking never killed anyone. And if it did, they died happy.
I just ran your car into a ups truck....but on a up note I have a handle of fireball and breakfast burritos
And that facial hair. He might as well shave it so it spells "douche" on one cheek and "nozzle" on the other.
She showed me her tits outside Taco Bell....After she flashed the dude working there in an effort to get in.
I just made my dating life into my own game show. would you like to meet the contestants? (photos not included)
Randomize
