We had to introduce ourselves in ethics class. This guy stood up said I'm mark, I love sluts and Jack. Then just sat back down. Hero status.
Peeing in public by noon, this is not a good indicator for the day.
I feel like we should actually go to church one of these days to thank god for saving us from herpes and babies.
Might be using my graduation money to pay for an abortion.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Throwing up into Nora's potty chair while simultaneously having beer shits was truly the highlight of my Christmas season.
Operation rebound complete... I fucked the bouncer
New life goal: fuck in the shopping cart
Crust to egg proportion prescribes to a pedantic form of quiche. It's like saying breakfast pizza isn't pizza at all.
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sorry I couldn't bail you out, apparenty they dont take credit cards over the phone. Did you at least make any friends in jail?
Why r u in my phone under "the last survivor"?
You bet your firm but soft ass I miss you
their motto was "the first one to get arrested wins" so of course today was interesting
Fursuit judi Dench just stared directly at me for 3 solid minutes telling me that cats arent dogs and i believe her because if i dont cat jason derulo might try to have sex with me
Let the record show that I hate your ass.
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