I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
made out with the bouncer to distract him from how illegitimate my fake id is.
do you want me to make hamburgers?
i'm vegan
i'll put lettuce on them
I'm in a subway station watching a tranny do her makeup. This is like watching a unicorn giving birth.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this girl im hooking up with thought my ring was a purity ring... apparently im taking it too slow
Had sex to a Lionel Richie song. I have a feeling I was conceived to it. Finally reached full circle.
we've been doin it since '07. it's like married sex now, were both comfortable so neither of us really tries anymore, we just do it because it's convenient
If you're not washing nut sweat off of your forehead this morning I'm disappointed in you
I AM SENDING THIS TEXT MESSAGE SO I DON'T LOOK AT HIM. THANK YOU FOR RECEIVING IT.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
omg. i wish i could describe to you the number of things that were just in my vagina. i feel like i got gangbanged by construction workers.
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
I'm drunk off vodka and I haven't eaten today. I've never felt more like Kirsten Cohen in my life.
He walked into the pizza shop... Pulled the fire alarm.. And proceeded to dance to it...
Oh you have the munchies, Dad? That's great and congratulations on the weed but STOP EATING MY APPLE PIE
I just saw a stripper light her nipples on fire. Im terrified and impressed all at the same time
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