Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
I masturbated on the webcams with my bf yesterday then typed without washing my hands first... then my roommate used my laptop it was pretty priceless
turns out a healthy dose of cleavage is the equivalent of a swig of felix felicis
are you going to last longer than 15 seconds
nope
Even if you were sober, spitters are STILL quitters, end of story.
We started hooking up and a group of freshmen outside my window started chanting my name. Encouraging yet distracting
As much as I'm all for laying on his living room couch, watching spongebob and having spoon sex, it's becoming a routine.
its not like she's the last girl on the planet with symmetrical breasts and great skin
Her roommate texted her and told her that her cat died. Now she's double-fisting bottles of wine while howling and wailing her dead cat's name. Not how I pictured this booty call.
A Bum and I jusst hugged. its not even 8 pm.
If you hit me with your dick and make light saber noises we are breaking up. I don't care if it's your birthday, you are not a sex Jedi.
So is singing the star wars theme as I put the condom on off limits?
What's a quick way to get over an ex-boyfriend? To hear about how he threw up in a cup and then drank it. That's how.
I made him cum so hard he couldn't play video games for like an hour. I've never been more proud of myself.
Someone had to wrestle her in the chocolate pool, I'm glad I was man enough to step up and do it
i could only love him more if he was covered in glitter.
Randomize
