I just spent twenty minutes with brandons dad explaining why head isnt typically considered sex...can we say awkward?
on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
Today in psych we learned that you are a whore.
Me specifically?
Yep.
did you fuck him yet?
hahaha who do you think your talking to.. a nun?
My vagina hasn't been this smooth since I was 8. I better get laid tonight.
But in the grand scheme of things, "should i bang a hot roommate or a sexy giant" is really not a bad lot in life
I forgot how easy it is to have sex in public when you're wearing a dress. Thank you global warming.
He ate shrooms at 9:30, said, "see you later," and left. I am alone on New Years.
Is it weird that I Facebook creep hot people from their credit card receipts?
Being single for so long makes me fucking creepy.
It's a noodle incident. All I can say is that it was completely accidental, no one was too seriously injured, and I'm not allowed back to that bar without a designated pusher for my wheelchair.
ok so i took my anxiety medication and i'm eating junior mints and i think my vagina will be ok
He just showed up in boxer briefs and loafers with only his phone and condoms
Kids I used to babysit are now fuckable members of my social media periphery.. Getting old sucks
it’s about to be september and all i keep thinking is what if i go (another) full calendar year without having sex?
On a scale of 1 to 10, with 1 being “good” and 10 being “banging a student’s father”, how bad is it that I’m banging a student’s father?
Randomize
