So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
We pay for beer, you give birth. It's how the world works.
maddie and i have invented a community puke bowl. explanation later
Highlight of my weekend: having my card suspended due to "suspicious charges" and standing in line at the gas station yelling at customer service on the phone that I really did go to 4 different strip clubs in one night
I'm at a party with half naked strippers driving in a little kids battery powered mustang around a stipper pole in his bedroom
She just got out of the car and said "hold on purse.. It's going to be a bumpy ride"
Also, I think I'm too drunk to be at the gym right now. But how sober do you need to be for IM volleyball?
His response today determines what state my vagina will be in this weekend.
she asked me where ive been her entire life and the guy in the room next to us yelled "with other women bitch!"
We got caught having sex in the bathroom by my professor. In accordance with tradition, we still brofisted. I think my grade went up considerably.
So apparently someone caught him as he was falling. And carried him around the rest of the night.
Rebecca hasn't has this number in 3 months. Please tell all her friends to stop calling at 3 am. We are not interested in buying or selling drugs nor do we want to hook up with anyone. You all need to go to rehab.
Just had a threesome with a married couple.
Stop living my dream.
"fuck it, let's do moonshine" shouldn't be in ANYONE'S vocabulary.
I woke up spooning with two strangers on Saturday morning... I felt like a sexual sandwich
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