The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
I have to brush my teeth today to feel like I did something.
he legitimately fell asleep standing up at the club. everyone was impressed
Needing to keep one leg on the floor during sex so you dont spin should qualify for some kind of drunk award.
His morals are debatable, but his heart or perhaps his penis is in the right place.
His penis is crooked. Right place? Maybe he starts there, but then he slants.
Indoor beer darts at Rafs just turned into a trust exercise of putting your hand on the wall and closing your eyes while the other throws.. Almost gave Cale a Tracheotomy
Yes stubble LOOKS hot but factor in his shitty bj skills and I might as well have jacked off with apricot scrub
if this uncomfortable exchange we're having is you trying to flirt with me i suggest you stop it before someone gets hurt
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
She invited us over for cocaine and donuts
The time stamp on this text message is reason enough alone to not leave me unsupervised
I told her we had to stay at the bar until at least midnight because that's when my direct deposit hit, don't tell me i'm not responsible
Who knew she had talents apart from chugging wine spritzers
My New Year's resolution consists of less weekday hangovers, more sex, and more money.
I’ll call you later. There’s a jilted trophy wife looking for a revenge fuck at my door
Randomize
