that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
i literally forgot his name and just started calling him "waffles"
I can only be a whore so many days outta the week.
Samesies
Just got roadhead while going 95. I came for a mile and a half.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm officially my mother.. Smoking in the garage pretending to take the dog out in a big ugly jacket
shut up i haven't hooked up with anyone since 45 minutes ago
My cleaning lady broke my bubbler. It's awkward between us now.
Why?
Because she knows I do drugs and I know she's a clumsy bitch.
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
Hey. Make all the seamen/semen jokes you want. Not many people can say they fucked 2 different girls in two different countries in one week on a tax free bonus. Next up: Italy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your life is one shit show away from being a lifetime movie.
my whole checking account just had a funeral down bourban street, paid for that, and then bought everyone 5 shots of fireball...
I'm eating Swedish fish out of my boobs and watching SOA.. There is no way your Tuesday night will be better than mine.
I feel better now, I have multiple fuck buddies again
Typical. We're ready to go, and you're not wearing pants.
be the chaos you wish to see in the world...
i'm trying to figure out how to respond to that in text
Randomize