I feel like our bond as friends is a lot stronger now that I've talked to you on the phone while having sex.
I am watching the symphony and have decided that violin players probably give really good hand jobs.
i need to find a notary that isn't going to turn me in for blatantly lying to the us and chilean governments
All she kept whispering was put your pickle in my mouth. Then she fell out of her barstool and chipped her tooth
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I want to get my vag crammed with complete loss of every bit of dignity I have left by this man from every angle on every flat surface that exists. That is all.
The cops showed up and one of them got pushed in the pool. When he got out he looked really sad so I got him a towel and hugged him. He arrested all the underage drunkards but me.
Walking into the first day of college is like walking into a meat market. A meat market of sex.
it is basically gonna be an ugly Christmas sweater rave
She just left someone a voicemail saying 'you better not have plans Saturday night, cause I'm going to sit on your face.'
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I love you but I don't want to see you naked.
he won't tell me his last name, but I know his garage key code
ANNA YOU PEED ON THE STREET. LIKE NOT EVEN SUBTLY. YA JUST SQUATTED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HIGHWAY. And you flashed your tits to oncoming vehicles to try to get them to pick us up
i dunno, a lot of my childhood feels like a drugged up fever dream
Is that your Nuva ring on the floor? Shit must have gotten crazy
His nipple licking is glorious
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