ur dog is so gonna tell on us one day.
for doing what?
for smoking bowls out on the deck while your parents aren't home.
Well maybe next time you won't tell me to do whatever I want.
No i dont need Magnum Condoms, that would be like putting MC Hammer pants on my dick
She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
OK! No more randoms over for the next month this is the third fucking time I caught a naked dude drinking my OJ in the middle of the night.
Look man, sometimes you just gotta say "Sure! Why not? I can always take a shower afterwards"
I truly just stopped puking in my 730 am calculus class, looked up, corrected my professor, then resumed puking my eyes out. He was both impressed and disgusted.
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
How many ballsacks did you see last night because I saw eight
What's the point of bringing a Jack and Coke to work if my boss is just gonna piss and moan about me day drinking again?
YO I WASNT TRYING TO MAKE A PASS AT YOU.... Or Jesus
Eat your greens and take your tequila shots
Then, even the devil himself would be scared of us. And we'd be bestfriends with Jesus. He would love us.
11:30 and people are pissing in the sink. It's gonna be a good night.
So some guy thought I took second place in a male stripper competition
Randomize
