It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
And then I'm going to yell into her vagina and see if it echoes
I was more traumatized by the table collapsing while i was going down on you.
We left the window open. My vibrators funeral is at 2ish.....bring a side dish or some shit.
the bouncer watched the girl drop her ID, saw me pick it up and say OMG SHE LOOKS LIKE ME, and then let me use it to get into the bar
She kept saying the tortilla understood her. I honestly don't know where she found a tortilla at the pool.
Gonna bang his former student. Clearly I am winning this breakup.
I just woke up tangled in fishing line while wearing someone else's bathing suit with fishes drawn all over me. What kind of sex did we have?
My wife managed to convince me to not drink everclear by threatening to ban me from her vagina
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
Like people our age are getting engaged, and I’m out here spooning with a giant unicorn I bought at Walmart on Black Friday.
I think sunday funday got a little out of control. There is cheese slices and BBQ sauce all over the roof and 4 empty bottles of vodka in my room.
I'm laying in bed cuddling with my teddy bear and eating waffles. I need a fucking boyfriend
I don't think he knows you can have sex sober...
What are you feeling right now?
Idk. I just flashed a porch 🤷🏼♀️
So not in the best place to do an emotional inventory
Randomize
