I don't know which is worse: knowing all the free porn websites, or knowing which days they update their free porn.
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
i was actually impressed that she managed to throw up underwater while scuba diving
two words...techno handjob
Shame should no longer be a word in your vocabulary.
we found you under the sink... we opened up the doors and you told us to go away because you were playing indian in the cupboard
If is anything like my past relationships, I have no doubt that I will single-handedly reignite the Cold War
Yeah. Just jump him. Naked. Claim his dick for yourself.
Our first crop came in on the day that they added Hercules to Netflix Instant, I think it's the universe telling us that it approves of us growing shrooms in our guest room.
I LIKE NICE BOXERS OKAY!? COMBINED WITH A GLORIOUS DICK JUST MAKES THIS EVEN BETTER. WE MOVE IN TOGETHER AND THAT PIC'S GETTIN FUCKING FRAMED.
WHY DID HE INTRODUCE ME TO HIS MOM? CAN'T HE JUST HIDE ME LIKE EVERYONE ELSE I'VE EVER DATED?@!
I lick assholes and I wouldn't eat mdma
i wish he'd fuck me as good as he is at karate.
IDK if she's gay or not, but there is something about the way she looks at me that says "do dirty dirty things to me." I have no choice but to oblige.
Randomize