I have a client coming in and there's a note that says she wants her hair to like Elisabeth Hasselback's from the view
that's Oklahoma for you
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
That haircut screams I'm 35 but I still eat pussy.
Bring it all. We will have a potluck of drugs. It will be magical.
My econ prof just gave me a shot glass because I was the "randomly picked" winner of the lecture. Ties into our supply and demand lecture, supplied with a shot glass, demand a thirsty thursday
Let me start this apology by saying I'm sorry that I bit your penis.
we cut her off and put her in bed but by the time we got back to the drinks she was already there shirtless. she's the topless tequila ninja
Look, if he's not the brother with three nipples, I'm just not interested.
The chick got into the cab with us and said we have 3 chances to guess what she just stuck up her ass. Hello to you to!
Def just hooked up with my brother's senior prom date in his bed. Does that make me the worst brother ever?
I did the walk of shame in nothing but a sleeping bag and now I'm on my way to pick up plan B. Let's not make a habit of this.
Sounds like a good New Years
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
I just got winded making my bed. How do you think the workout plan is going?
My throat is burning
Thats because you proceeded to drink the salsa because you thought it was alcohol...dumbass
At one point did I say I have a doctorate in fuck u?
Randomize
