Well I left you a voicemail but you probably won't be able to hear it because my mic is fucked up. I think you need to come down here and take it in for me.
I hate this phone so bad I'm going to lose all of my friends because of it
Yeah...you probably will...
well, you're marked off my christmas card list for next year.
if i die, you can have my worn out liver and american apparel deep v's.sell the liver to a chinese restaurant
so her cute freckles turned out to be blackheads
His friends call him "Gasm".... Im going for it.
The last thing I remember is pushing my way into the bathroom and dumping a 40 on him. We havent talked since.
Awkward family moment #1: walked in on my 15 yr old nephew packing a bowl. Nephew says- "lets not ruin christmas and keep this our little secret"
He just tried to eat my hair and he keeps talking about pissing on everything, come home soon I beg of you
he gave me a thermos so I could take my coffee with my on drive of shame. I was unexpectedly grateful...
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
They've taken all the lighthearted fun out of S&M.
What if for Halloween I paint my self gold and make sandwiches for everyone? I'd be a trophy wife! Get it?
Whatever. I have his dick. Haha how many girls can say they have a dildo replica of a guy they were seeing
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
Today will be the day I throw up in my backpack in the middle of class
Randomize
