Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
i didn't know you could wash puke off of bras with a dishwasher.
I don't want to talk about it. He was like the Little Engine that couldn't get me off.
we just stared at taco bell's menu on the website for 2 hours
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i say over christmas we have a beer pong competition with the cousins and see who really has the best genes in the family.
What happened on tuesday that a stripper knows my full name?
I don't think you have the libido for two women at the same time
I think you underestimate the amount of time spent masturbating
if I could send you my dick right now I would. that's how good of a friend I am.
I'm at about main and main street
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey. I can't work your space dryer so I'm wearing your blanket home. I'll get my clothes later. Fun party!
The woman that sang I Touch Myself died today. There's only one appropriate way to honor her memory.
I'm on the job.
I wish I could be happy with a nice Christian girl, but no, I need a hot mess who starts bar fights
Accepting his friend request would be the Facebook equivalent of pity sex.
Apparently swingers are magnetically drawn to me?
U NO SLUT. YOUR HEART IS JUST FREE.
Randomize