I would drag my balls through a mile of broken glass to eat pudding out of her anus
at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
he sat in the bathtub shirtless yelling in gibberish for 40 minutes. funniest. stoner. ever.
you kept telling everyone how your ninja turtle shell also functioned as a backpack
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
just to let you know, its not cheating if i cant feel my hands.
I just ate a can of beans for dinner so I can afford to go get a 5$ bottle of wine. I really did not think these choices would still be necessary at age 25.
DICK PUNCH EXTRAVAGANZAAAAAA!!!!!
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
Someone just knocked jenga into a plate of cake. I'm licking off each piece one by one.
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
Not even joking, someone broke into the house to watch porn. The cops are on the way.
I had mdma, weed, and alcohol in my system. My doctor seems to think that's how I tore my groin.
he fucked me wearing a cowboy hat and made grits after
We call him Texas for a reason.
He's so vague sometimes. Like dude, we've been friends for 3 years. I don't need you to be vague, I need you to be inside of my vagina.
I love that my family celebrates every holiday with a joint. Chanukah? Mazel-juana! Easter? What's more spring than the color green? Election day? What better way to celebrate democracy in action than medical pot?