now i know why they say having sex with her is the equivalent to licking a pay phone
so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
why is it that everytime a half black man enters something boring, it suddenly becomes sexy to people? golf? the presidency?
I just googled maps his house, and took the virtual tour back to my apartment, just so I could visualize the walk of shame in the morning
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I know I'm really high but I swear I just saw him beating off to his fantasy football roster.
i cant text you anymore tonight, God gave me two hands for two cups
Admitting I go to nursing school is my subtle way of saying, yes, I know every muscle in your penis and how to effectively use them.
He told me I just kept sending him the word sex and dollar signs.
Well... When your girlfriend fucks your sister, the 2 week courtesy window goes out the door.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm going to take a nap so I don't feel like a stripper sneezed in my mouth tomorrow morning at work.
The cleaning lady has moved my vibrator twice now so I would say I'm pretty ready to move out.
She just got on the scale. frowned, got off and took off her pants and then got back on
Everclear isn't food dammit
sorry I called you to cry about the state of the neopets economy
That ass isn’t going to eat itself.
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