please tell me you didn't have sex with him in the bathroom...
Does an alley count?
i just shaved my vag. i figure it gave me about ten more minutes to drink tomorrow.
Is it weird to say that getting an std with you was kinda romantic?
My entire summer has consisted of being too drunk for this shit, too sober for this shit, or too hungover for this shit.
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I'm going to make out with someone. I'm on a mission. I don't even care if I'm wearing beer goggles. As long as he's not shorter than me, gay, or a woman.
Your stories are the best. I feel like you're a spy among the heteros. It's not fair.
Dude he did say "let's go cougar hunting" and you KNEW your mom was going out last night...so it's kind of your own fault for not coming
It could be worse. I was dumped by a guy in a kilt after he gave my shoes away on St. Patrick's Day.
You know that feeling when you wake up and your whole body just smells like a penis?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Almost stopped showering halfway through to go get food
Sexy intern needs to have caveman sex with me
...and if you can get the necessary ingredients to make the Buffalo Chicken Melt, I will latch forever at your Teat of Justice.
we panicked because we couldn't find you anywhere, but then we found you tripping in the bathtub with Marie's cat. there was no water. you thought there was water, though.
UPDATE: THERE IS ASS EATING. I REPEAT: THERE IS ASS EATING.
I smell like heartbreak.
Tequila and sloppy rebound sex?
How did you know?
Randomize