Fuck their fairy tale bullshit. I shall ruin it. With a few thrusts of my cock.
No - a douche bag is not a fashion accessory. They do not make Gucci Douchebags
I wishh there was a lost and high section in walmart cause I would be there right now
Pls don't use the words alligator, purple, and sperm in the same sentence ever again.
he handed me my panties in front of my date. turns out he wasn't that mad.
Year anniversary in a month. Think I'll just give him a COME ON MY FACE FREE card. I'm both broke and shameless.
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
He just walked up to me in the kitchen, pulled out his penis and stuck it in my sweatpants pocket.
It was probably cold. Sweatpants pockets are notoriously warm.
He tried to convince me that it wasn't really that small and all he had to do was pull back the groin fat. It was still small.
So because I got upset you didn't answer I threw my phone in the garbage disposal last night
Ugh. Lets go crawl into a dairy-gluten-chlamydia free hole somewheres.
I just took the batteries out of the xbox remote so she could replace the dead ones in her vibrator If that's not love I don't know what is
When you get shitfaced you find strippers when I get shitfaced I speak to woodland creatures, do you see the dilema?
He's been watching the World Cup too much because right before he came he screamed "NUT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" for half a minute. Our landlord is not happy.
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