I do remember getting hit in the face by an ugly one because she thought I was blowing on her butthole.
Side note, we are 25 fighting over our sophmore year RAs Drunk facebook attention
You obviously dont comprehend the level of insane i operate at
The cab driver thought we were passed out so he called a sexline...
at wine tasting. Can i cleanse my Palate with a frito?
I'm pretty sure I just crapped out my pancreas. I have 2 of those, right?
not now. havin a heart to heart with drunk fred flinstone
Just saw a woman in bootie shorts and a winter coat at the library. God. Bless. Prostitutes.
We're all just looking at each other quietly, hoping that no one brings up last nights shenanigans.
Just so you know, I woke up with 2 oven mits in my bed and no clothes on.
You know you're too drunk when you start calling people out for unfollowing you on social networks.
Stoned stonnnnnnned on the raaaaange
if you guys find pieces of my teeth don't throw them out please
Our sub is singing "i believe i can fly" after yelling at the class this whole time and this is really hella weird
so i went to the bathroom and my thong was on sideways... i guess that solves the mystery
Randomize
