i hope S**** or M***** or someone took note of the fact that i was drinking popov like water and could no longer form sentences. i mean, dont get me wrong i had been thinking about boning R*** long before my sobriety left the picture but the number of reasons not to, outweighed the temptation and without sir robert burnett as R***'s wingman, it would have never happened
Food network will be on but we won't be watching
O by "watching" I mean "background noise"
She said as long as i don't wake her up she doesn't care what hole i use.
Got yourself a keeper right there.
I just googled maps his house, and took the virtual tour back to my apartment, just so I could visualize the walk of shame in the morning
I just puked in a penis shaped cake pan. I've hit an all new low for a Tuesday.
you missed kickoff and the first round of bodyshots. I suggest you get here now.
It's like the last supper of drinking before the summer ends
Eye surgery went well. Just can't believe it took getting lasers through my eyes to temporarily stop the vivid sex dreams I was having
We don't know where he is but he left his pants and what appears to be a tooth here so he's gotta come back sometime
It is a bad day indeed when you learn that your boy toy looks better in your dresses than you do
You guys are like the reason that ketamine is a controlled substance.
HE PUT A HOLE. IN. MY. HOUSE!!!
My mom found my empty case that I hid in my room and just said "now why don't you be a responsible underaged drinker and throw it in the recycling" and walked away. I'm in shock.
Come over I need help. I just almost died in an acid flashback while listening to do You Feel Like We Do off of the Frampton Comes Alive album.
You ever stub your boner? It happened to me. Just know that drugs and strip poker and a hot tub. I'll Regale you with the story over drinks later.
Randomize
