Being alone has allowed me to flourish into a complete weirdo
I will give you a bj if you get me food. NOT A JOKE. FREE BJ.
My teachers should feel privileged to see me this morning, after the amount of alcohol I consumed last night.
we didnt even have break up sex...
you had it for us with someone else...
not much just sitting outside his bathroom door naked eating cheetoes. You?
What's the politically correct way of saying you've made someone your bitch?
If you really wanted to hide the fact you were gay, you could have at least had the sense to not get drunk in the same bar as your bf.
I told him that his face would look perfect between my legs. One of my most successful strategies yet.
If the river was whiskey, it would be the best river ever.
When we tried to make a video I set the camera to 3sec pictures accidentally so instead of a movie we have a flipbook of our sex.
I wanna fuck that hideous moustache right off your face. get the confetti ready for the festivities
I just woke up in my locked bathroom. It's 5 PM. What happened?
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
Im experiencing the awkward moment after realizing two of my straight female friends have had sex with each other
There is way too much butt cleavage here for a formal event.
Randomize
