piano lessons. No girlfriend. What's up.
Haha Tomato, Tomato. That doesn't work very well via text message.
and I asked her"are you allergic to condoms latex like your older sister " she said "Idk this is gonna be my 1time"
It's a Westpoint/Army thing, we talk about Miley Cyrus a lot
Why?
Because when is jailbait ever not funny? Answer: Never
i love insurance, just had an iv with 4 bags of fluid, 2 shots of finagrin and a 2 hour nap . woke up without a hangover. all for $20
Well, I can't relate. I have no idea what it feels like to withhold sex. Or have self-control in general.
i think we should start charging the bum that sleeps on our porch rent..
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
They're letting me teach a freshman-laden class now. This university needs better background checks.
Did you guys seriously let me trade my id for a kebab last night??
Hate sex is good. Drunk sex is better. Combine those two however and you get the best experience of your LIFE.
Just saw you in traffic. You may have noticed me, I was the corpse driving the white car.
he looks SO much like Drake, I feel like an extreme groupie every time we have sex.
Karaoke machines out. We're taking turns farting into the microphone. Shits going south fast. Definitely be awake when you get home.
What’s the best way to find out if he’s into anal?
I think you have the wrong number, but good luck with that
Randomize
