She is my favorite of all the girls you have fucked. Other than me.
i actually have a tan line from him holding my boob while we were sunbathing
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
That's terrible. At least give it a creative name like muff mobile.
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The druken crowd just broke into singing "God Bless America" while waiting the newlyweds to get in the limo. My friend is eating rose petals.
I think our camping neighbours like us. We're the drunk girls trying to chop firewood with no pants on at 3 in the afternoon.
Some might say its sad that I am willingly picking up a coke habit to be the skinniest bridesmaid... I think it shows my great dedication and proves I should have been maid of honor.
Currently behind the bar at some asian place, pouring drinks for everyone with a snake around my neck
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
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at one point while they were drilling into my jaw I just remember thinking "will I ever be able to suck dick again"
I climbed up on the tank of the toilet so I could take a slo-mo vid of myself pissing into the garbage can, but the base of the toilet shattered and I had to bail.
You may be fancy. But you'll never be having cheesy garlic bread and scotch at 3am fancy.
I'd have to have a ring. Like I don't want to be called "the ex girlfriend that shit on me"
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
i'd like to schedule a penis for 4pm please.
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