There was this creepy guy on the bus. So I puffed out my stomach & began so hold my stomach like I was preggers.
Dude. Fucked her last night. Fucked her this morning. went downstairs for water. took 18 pack of Coors Light instead and took it back to my gf's. Got a blow job from her. Drinking the beer on my deck now. Best Day ever.
I'm like a warm blanket that has sex with you
he held my hand while i was giving him head. freud's gotta be turning over in his grave
Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
ONE NIGHT STAND. You have 27 minutes before the offer expires, so I suggest you hurry.
I'm glad we have the kind of friendship where if either of us is too drunk to fuck a hot guy, we pass the responsibility to each other and get the job done.
I just re read that. We really need to get our lives together.
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
A beef tasting is not what I needed while hungover
I threw up in a pringles can. how do you think my night went.
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
I FOUND THE LEGS
Uber driver has left leg up on the dash and turn signal on for about a mile, there's Chipotle wrappers on the floor, but she's hot. 5 stars.
you had her IN YOUR BED NO PANTS AND YOU GAVE HER THW BOOT?!?!?!
Stage five clinger bro. had to go.
Randomize
