There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
Her name starts with A and ends with whore.
i feel like even strangers are annoyed with me because of how drunk i was last night
My jaw hurts. Such a slutty injury..
my mom just poured a water bottle of wine to take my dog on a walk...
Doing Jager Bombs on a Sunday morning is justified...How else is my team going to win?
i could've stared at her spine forever man..she was so deep, and she made a drink out of vodka and organic mangoo shit. i will find her and present that goddess with some fucking gummies
you're no longer allowed out of my sight at parties
Please come over, I'm slowly melting into a ball of sexual frustration. If I'm not dead by the end of the day be very surprised.
No but I was fuckin done when I realized my acrylic nail caught fire when I was hitting the bong.
I can't thank you enough for the well-timed blowjob. What a huge improvement in my outlook on the day.
They live across the street from a school baseball field so they have porter potties across the street and let's just say that I'm grateful they exist
I think I fell asleep on the dance floor at one point...but played it off cool and acted like I just did the robot.
When we found you, you were half crying/half singing Taylor swift songs at 2am in the bathroom, and occasionally puking. I think I get "friend of the year" award just for putting up with your drunk ass all night.
Then it hit me - his penis wasn't a shiny new toy anymore and I wanted a new one.
Randomize
