is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
Girl just texted me a pic of her boobs with the caption "don't think I'm a whore"
I find it ironic that im starting my birth control on mothers day.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
I found him crying and drunk, in my closet holding a picture of Tyler Perry. He managed to say"he's just so many people"
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
my mom just cut me up lemons and limes so i would have some vitamins with my tequlia
walk of shame to my ortho appointment. kids are staring. this little girl just asked her mom if she can havr glitter in her hair too.
Just casually ripping a bowl in the chicken coop, with the chickens. NBD
I think a girl on my floor is watching zombie porn. There is literally no other description for the noise coming from her room.
They've already turned me into the Dean of Students once because they felt 'unsafe' because I came home hammered and asked one of them to make me a grilled cheese sandwich. Like, I just ASKED!
You called me last night and said you had a vision that a cat made you a sandwich. You were tripping way too hard
It was 3 am when she drunkenly tried to deep-fry a banana.
How'd she do that?
I've given up on the male species, I'm just going to be a lonely whore for the rest of my life.
Will you PLEASE get your mom to stop telling me I'd make a great husband? She knows I'm gay, right?!
I know, but she really likes you. Have you met my brother yet?
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