I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
if i wake u up at 5am tmrw by coming into ur room wearing nothing but my indiana jones hat and purple socks while singing 'courtesy of the red white + blue' will u be pleased or annoyed
keep in mind this isn't open to negotiation, i'm just trying to gauge ur reaction
so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
Nights like last night are what makes cleaning up the vomit in the morning worth it
She was narrarating everything she did.. like while making toast.
apparently i was just sitting there with my shirt down holding my boobs saying "its ok. its all gonna be ok"
weed salsa. i deserve a nobel prize
Family bonfire. I just discovered my cousin drank an entire bottle of champagne at the age of 7. I just got showed up.
Yeah. I've decided no relationship can survive me shoving my boobs in the guys face
Maybe he'll be famous someday and I can forget that anything embarrassing may have happened and just say that I fucked that famous guy.
Oh, and apparently I was butt ass naked and walked into the room where anna was skyping her dude in afghanistan and said "This is happening."
I set up her keyboard so that no matter what she does, it will open up RedTube. Click and command Q all you like, its going to porn. No I play the waiting game
Don't laugh, but I might need some advice on how to ride a crooked dick.
I just sneezed and margarita mix and ash came out of my nose. I love jersey
I'm pants less watching buffy the vampire slayer drinking rum. I'm not that hard to impress
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