I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
You finger a girl once and she thinks she loves you. I'm going back to boys. Lesbians are needy.
woke up to an unread text message i sent to myself: "brreakfdast..pork and ice cream."
So, Southern Comfort will donate 25 cents for every bottle sold towards Gulf Coast Relief... Can we save the wetlands through my alcoholism?
her face looked like how i feel after Taco Bell
can you call in chlamydia to work? like if the antibiotics they gave you for it are giving you the shits...
Just told him about my threesome. if that doesn't make him want to date me nothing will.
it's official, after last weekend my girl number is higher than my guy number. fix this.
Human Centipede: The Drinking Game. This is non-negotiable. First one to pass out the rest of us get to FEEEEED THEM!
This strange Italian man told me he wants to take me for ice cream and kept calling me "tomato" from tinder
There's a Japanese guy here dressed as a Viking who just screamed "wats up cocksluts" and kicked a guy in the face. come get me out of here.
How does fucking Canada get Justin Good Guy Take Me Now, Just Fuck Me In The House of Commons Trudeau, and our new President looks like he bathes in cheetoh dust and sin?
why is there a shopping cart in my back seat? and a dick drawn on the side of my car?
Literally.... Guy kissing himself in mirror in this hotel elevator
Are we allowed to ho on the roof?
Randomize
