theyre doing shots to celebrate her boob jobs anniversary.
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
his tattoo said carpe diem which i thought was ironic considering his epilepsy
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
Need to stop getting stoned with this chick, I keep waking up covered in pizza sauce
Okay, just a casual question: how did i manage to get grass stains on the inside of my bra?
I guess I'm in a committed relationship. We just had shot 1 of 3 of Gardasil. I'm now dead inside.
I can't tell if they're having sex or watching the beach scene from Saving Private Ryan. All I know is I hear explosions and men screaming and crying
She looks well worn, presumably from a cavalcade of penis.
Just scratched my head and I basically rained glitter.
I'm way too hungover for life right now
I'm going to preface tonight by saying that I'm sorry for tequila, shopping carts, and having to chase me.
Well, he kept asking me if I was going to murder him once we got upstairs. It sort of killed the mood.
listen. i haven't sucked a dick in well over three years but i believe in myself.
sam was dropping a deuce next to me. wrote me a note that said "glad we shared this experience." passed it under the wrong stall. the other guy picked it up. that's all I know so far.
Randomize
