He said if I blew him first he'd last longer....if 3 minutes is lasting longer, I'm not sure the bj was worth it
i have more money on itunes than i do in my bank account... college.
I am watching the symphony and have decided that violin players probably give really good hand jobs.
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
Why would vodka do this to me? I've always been loyal
I knocked myself out momentarily last night when I fell and hit my head off of my jewelry box while trying to take his pants off... while he was passed out.
It's like hey here is one penis enjoy nothing but that for the rest of your life
It's like the blind leading the senile over here.
UPDATE: shit just got real- grandma is threatening to beat grandpa with a wooden spoon covered in chili.
Partying with them is like having your dick stapled to your left nostril
Oh yeah I remember when I first saw Kyler's balls. If there's anything high school swim prepared me for, it's the amount of testicles I would see here
Well I woke up and my arm was bleeding. And my blood is on the wall in the hallway.
Umm
No idea. I blame fireball.
Valid.
My mom said she saw you at the grocery store. Said you looked like you were "headed for a Lindsay Lohan quarter life crisis of sorts"
Tacos and sex are way better than any anti depressant pill ever was. I think I made a medical discovery here.
hey sorry i didnt call i just got out of jail, so you still dtf ?
100000% expect a picture of my ass in them
Randomize
