Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
There's a "art of the blow job" class in the city. We should go
Baby, I'm all set with that. That would be like trying to teach bruce lee how to kick someone in the head
i wanna anger bang this girl behind me at work. she never shuts up with her annoying voice. but her boobs are phenom.
You took a bag of frozen peas to bed wiith you "to help with the inflamation".
Just saw a guy walking down the street carrying a giant inflatable penis
Just arrived at our party
I woke up next to her boyfriend and she woke up next to mine....
This is like a fucked up game of musical chairs.
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
I've never seen a dude bust out of his jacket and rock an air banjo like u
You're lucky you got out when you did, about an hour later the girl in the Franzia box started wrestling everyone.
Wanna shave the hair on my back? If you're offended I was joking, if not I'll bring booze and maybe you can do other regions too.
He said he loves me but he haven't eaten me out yet. So I don't think he means it.
I woke up this morning to find my closet lacking 98% of my clothes and a text from my male roommate saying your dresses squeeze my genitals
Long story short I shit on a sidewalk while walking with multiple people. Then sprinted around the streets of Tallahassee in only gym shorts as I tore my toga off and wore it as a cape.
My professor just told my lab he could drive us around town in his 1991 Lincoln towncar limo for our bar crawl. This just keeps getting better!
Anyhow. He gives me orgasms and cuddles and buys me dinner and alcohol. Ill keep him around and cross that other girl bridge when we get there ha ha
Randomize
