i would really appreciate it if you would stop texting my girlfriend.
i would really appreciate it if you would stop cock blocking me.
I've decided that life's journeys are more fun when your moral compass hangs in front of you and swings with each step
We were doing it doggy style, and I puked on the floor and started crying, he told me it was okay his cat would eat it... and if it would make me feel better we could do anal...
And they lived happily ever after....
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
yeah he was eating me out and i didnt know someone made popcorn so I thought the smell was comming from my vagina
wtf
So i learned you can't hair-of-a-dog jaeger hangovers.
I'm puking to John Mayor, save me. Or at least change it to somethong beyyt
My hair is short now so it will be easier to give you alot more blow jobs
I'm going to take this text and frame it on my mantle
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
her wearing orange crocs at the bar was definitely a great form of contraception
be warned: you might find a baby hampster in my bra
This guy at the airport was telling me 3/4 dudes in his group got rufied at some strip club. One guy woke up in the hospital, another found himself in a random parking garage, the other got back to the room and they all shit their pants. Go Vegas.
So like, boobs.
are you really going to start every conversation like that?
Shroomed with my best friend'a dad at his wife's surprise birthday party so you can say I have experience in the field
you were on a whole other level. you went home with him because he said "you got some light ass eyes"
Randomize