It looked like if robin williams had a vagina
So are we goin out tonight?
Dude, we woke up in your car in some parking lot last night...
And that was fun, wasn't it?
did the walk of shame from ex-boyfriend's room only to find other ex-boyfriend sitting in the living room. some people shouldn't be allowed to be friends.
some people shouldn't be allowed to be desperate.
The guy I was getting with last night took off his purity ring mid-sex and threw it across the room.
And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.
its not college until your roomate walks in on you having sex in his bed. twice
i was quietly enjoying my waffles when he came downstairs naked, kissed me on the forehead, and thanked me for the night before. i didnt even know anyone stayed over.
He just yelled in the bar, "So I stuck it in two girls butts, why are you bringing that up now?"
You did a strip tease for the toilet.
Instead of getting a taxi some gay black guy drove us home. He is trying to break into the taxi business
Way to promote small business.
And suddenly....Tubas. Tubas everywhere.
I don't think Buddha would recommend a sexscpade across Mexico
You know, you could always move. Lol somewhere without gators, water moccasins, and Marco Rubio.
The fact that u had sex with a Disney prince blows my mind, you're my hero.
Does this cleavage amount say, “Fuck it, I’m over dating, let’s just fuck?”
Randomize
