i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
He started to lick my mole,thinking it was my nipple.
no, he came in my armpit
yeah that always happens. i'm like the where's waldo of parties. i never even know where the fuck i'm at.
Is there a word for someone who only has sex with NFL prospects?
If I had a dollar for every time i woke up screaming for my pants i"d have enough money to buy all the beer I stole last night.
The sign say "Kereoke" strip bar. 5 more beers and ill be ready to rumble.
The plan was to get laid... Now the plan is to survive.
our friendships a beautiful delicate flower...that has been crushed by peni
Almost caused a huge accident on the highway because I was distracted by how orange the road barrels were
I woke up with jello shots in pant pockets so I must've had fun
Being responsible doesn't make memories.
I'll be wearing lingerie and holding a bottle of bourbon so pick up whatever food you think goes with that
I'm going to tell you something and I want no judgement because it's america day and I'm wearing an American flag bathing suit but...I woke up in a yard.
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
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