i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
I make your heart skip a beat like that pivotal moment when you open a public toilet lid
No it'll be my boobs and the luge part will be from my nipples. Everyone will be sucking beer from my perfectly sculpted and partially melted tits.
Woke up and took my pants off only to realize that I was wearing my shirt from last night as my underwear
OK, but next time I'd like to be present for our make-up sex.
What happened to no more shots?
It went out the window just like my dreams
I woke up with a black eye and a buttplug...not sure I really want to know what happened.
There is a fake eye lash glued to one of my balls.
If I ever drink whiskey again make sure I don't eat the plastic cups that I'm drinking them from.
All I know is I woke up with my apartment door wide open, naked, and I poured an entire bottle of Advil on my bed to sleep in.
I just drunkenly accidentally had sex with my boss
Did you at least ask for a raise?
No but I am now the owner of one of either his or his roomate's teeshirts... Maybe I can use it to negotiate?
so i find a box of condoms inside my car with turn by turn directions to her bedroom... kinda freaked out cause she got my address and somehow inside my car
Its that time in the evening when I've had a few cocktails and wish you'd make a video about the packers and Jack Daniels.
Randomize
