We are brilliant. We call it the pint walk. Killing a pint of vodka while we walk from cleveland park to dupont. just making mama proud
just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
My mom just bought me $200 worth of booze on the condition that I promise I won't have to go to rehab eventually
She was sitting there stuffing her face rubbing my back with a dorito cheese filled hand while eating something else with the other hand as I was crying.
Found a 10-can wizard staff hidden in our closet. Did we cut someone off?
That's yours. We cut you off.
If I am going to pay someone to make me puke, it's going to be the bartender.
I went from innocently day drinking to waking up handcuffed in jail. Fuck you game days
Also, putting laundry hampers on my head and pretending I'm an astronaut is a good way to get caught in every door frame in the house.
Due to certain anatomical proportions it was less like fucking and more like childbirth.
I either have a razor blade lodged in my throat or I've been drinking entirely too much Evan Williams.
I came home to him frying bacon to put in his beer. He said bacon beer lights, taste the awesomer rockies
jesus, I think that canada gold metal game has completely changed all rules of acceptable drinking habits, I was fucked untill noon and I just got invited to go party when I get off work...at 600am...and NO ONE understood why i was hesitant
I'm just going to ride dicks all the way to the to the gates of hell
So, anyways, aside from wanting to seduce my roommate for booze, how's everything been
My penis definitely considers my Captain Cock costume a success
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