Fuck 8am classes
Dear Jesus I'm gonna throw up through my eyes
We were sexting and then the radio announced robert pattinson would be playing kurt cobain in a movie and it totally killed the mood
He gave me a pearl necklace on top of my Karma necklace I was wearing. I guess I deserve whats coming to me.
He passed out naked in my bathroom, then took a shower, then passed out again and then took another shower. Last time I let my brother visit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Someday you'll be stoned enough to create a one-person step team and then you'll understand
I am listening to lecture and I can hear us in the background talking about anal beads.
It summer and it's getting a lot harder to hide sex bruises from my parents.
First world problems?
I'm beginning to worry that I seem to get along best with people when I'm naked with them.
Well. I guess talking about me stealing your wife may not be in the list of legit conversations
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you know i have almost 1500 fb friends but not ONE drunk booty call?
Well, I washed his beard with dish soap and then I fucked him three times.
I have to shave my legs first. I'm afraid tiny woodland creatures will fly out if he tries touches them.
Why was I lying under a truck last night?
I called plan parenthood at 407 am... Guess I was thinking ahead
He dicked me, fed me creme brulee, and didn’t make a big deal out of me causing a flood to come outta my vagina
Marry him NOW
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