Congratulations on your moose knuckle.
Thank you. Really, it was an honor just being nominated.
I thought he was joking about bailing you out until I saw the picture of you and the sheep in the morning paper. Were those my boots you had on it
I walk of shamed back from his dorm in costume while his dad and brother were waiting outside to drive him home. his dad apologized to me. my life never gets old.
dude sorry but u no that when a guys 'likes' ur pic on facebook it only means he was just jacking off to it.
Please fuck him. And then let me tell her. And then let me protect you from the knife she pulls from her Ed Hardy purse. Please.
Based on her brazillian stubble I would guess her plan had been to wait one more date before sleeping with me. Seems the plan was flexible.
U asked everyone for their hoodies so u could "safely hug the cactus"
I'm at this kids house trying to figure out if I pissed in his kitchen new years eve. Lmao, stop letting me drink.
Also, I just realized you seduced me while in a batman onesie... Well done, sir. Well done.
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
You're best friend just tackled me....naked....brought me to his room where he had freshly baked cinnamon rolls. I didn't know he could cook
Woke up with two different pairs of pants in the pockets of a jacket.None of the above are mine.
Now everytime I sit on a toilet I think about having sex with him. Great.
I came so hard my entire leg seized. Her blowjob gave me a Charlie horse.
I am going as Rudolph for the Christmas Eve furry orgie.
Is Santa taking the sleigh of slutty reindeer around the neighborhood again this year.
Yes. Several neighbors have requested it.
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