I have a fruit stripe tattoo on my penis. You're the only person I know who chews that gum.
On a scale of one to Chris Brown, how angry are you?
Dancing like a fucking crazy person to jai ho with a snow ball in her hand. Snow days make her go nuts.
you were smoking 3 cigarettes at once saying 'cancer isn't real! Its all in your head!'
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
Aw lol. Sounds like my masturbation injury last year
I feel I should make it clear.....I'm not stalking you, I'm stalking ur dick. You don't even need to talk when you get here. At 4am I think we'd both prefer that anyway.
Well right but if we go, he may just disappear for a long time into the unknown with the drag queens.
Oddly enough I feel totally fine now. Clonazapam and red bull the breakfast of champions.
Incase you were wondering. Cooking naked turns into sex. Sex and cooking may lead to house fire....
I'm ready to run through the streets naked yelling "HES ALIVE!"
oh you can't commit, don't have any real ambitions, and love to drink PBR? well.... sign me up!
I'm fairly sure I accidentally saw my dad naked last night
1. I drank goldschlager 2. I fell in a bathtub and hit my head (hard) on a soap dish. 2. I sat in said bathtub talking to a random stranger on vacation from wyoming (who i met at a 711 looking for taquitos) for almost an hour. 3. We got kicked out of said bathtub by owner of bathtub. 4. We had sex.
I have decided that I would still fuck Harrison Ford even though he is old as fuck now. Do you think it would kill him?
Most likely. But I bet he'd do a bang up job of it before he died.
He absolutely would.
Randomize
