I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
I really wish I could go back in time to change the course of events that led to me sitting on the internet at 3 Googling 'Traumatic masturbation' while talking to you about failed dates, and running a virtual restaurant in a video game.
And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
you probably should not have drank the wine that everyone spits out. and the sad part, that was not even your low point last night
He was putting purell on my boobs saying "they need to be clean for later." He hadn't had a drink all night
as nice as a boyfriend sounds, a relationship would require morals and self-restraint - both fields in which i lack.
momma always taught us never to change for a boy..
im wtih 32a right now bc 34d is on her period. now i know how girls feel when their hookups go from magnums to regulars
I think I reached optimum potential when I summersaulted straight into a kiddie pool.
No, earlier you attempted Jenga with everyones shoes.
This is one of those moments when you do what I say or I come stalk you down like a gazelle.
They shouted last call and the guy next to me and I looked each other up and down and went in unison "yup, you'll do"
By the way, anytime you want to go toe to toe on Doggystyle lyrics just let me know!
Who is this? Did we just become best friends?!
No worries, I've prioritized my homework into "can do drunk" and "should be sober" categories. We're good.
I woke up to both of you drawing on me in sharpie, unless a glorious threesome was had the night before that is not okay.
Who says it wasn't?
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
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