I just named my vagina "The Boneyard"
More like "Chia Pet"
The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
Intervention is following me on twitter.
wow.
Theres a truck parked on the front yard and i just want to take this opportunity to tell you now that it is not my fault.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She just ended a sentence with "and he doesn't even mind my herpes..."
at that time a 4 pound meatball stuffed with pizza rolls seemed more important than bailing you out of jail.... sorry.
we drunkly made out in the middle of the street beside the homeless guy playing the flute. Not how I imagined our first kiss.
Just stabbed myself in the face trying to lick melted cheese off a kitchen knife.
I don't think everyone found it as funny as I did... Nothing says "Party's Over" like the sound of a pump action shotgun.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I CAN'T DO THIS MUCH FABULOUS BEFORE LUNCHTIME
Wearing a shark mask, slugging tequilla, in cowboy boots, and not minding that my spandex is on backwards. What are you up to?
She said if her future children dont have blue eyes she wont love them
We'll get you some ice cream, but no sprinkles. Sprinkles are for winners.
Is it a problem if I'm trying to condition Goodbye Horses to trigger an erection?
we should paint friendship bongs
Randomize