Why did you send me a picture of a dick?
It was an accident sry. Not mine tho.
Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
I feel like i'm in the derek zoolander school for kids who can't read good.
Any time before 12:00pm. Can go fuck itself.
I have your camera. You have 35 naked pictures of me. you're welcome.
going to the gym drunk. fuck whoever made basketball season and getting a spring break ready body in the same season.
Dont worry about the blood on the pillow. its from my face.
I really don't think you should have 'baptized' your tattoo in vodka the same night you got it.
Quite frankly, I consider the fact that I'm NOT pregnant one of my greatest achievements and I'd like to chronicle that ongoing success. I'm going to post pictures of me at "0 weeks" once a week.
Her inability to understand the word "moderation" is the achille's heel of an otherwise perfect human
Just took a shot of tequila with a random guy at the supermarket. Happy cinco de fourth.
This chick had a condom box organized by size with dividers that glowed in the dark.
you said "i met the love of my life tonight" and i said "me?" and you said "no, hummus"
The modern romantic, surprising his gf w/ a gram of blow
The first thing my Christmas gift money is buying is a dildo.
Randomize
