Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
We had a complete conversation while I was giving him head, at one point he even stopped me and said 'I love how we're just hanging out.'
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
Being a slut is okay if you're being a polite slut, right?
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Let me clarify that those tears were for losing my fuck buddy and his penis, not to the fact that he decided he wanted an actual relationship with feelings.
My neighbor Chris is here. I am warning you, he is wearing a kilt I just saw his balls. Be incredibly careful that you don't see what I did.
Regardless of your intentions, deep throating a Twinkie is NOT sexy. You owe that poor cashier an apology the next time you pump gas.
Who's the easier target... Bandages on the knees, tramp stamp, or bra showing? Not in the mood to work for it tonight.
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
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He poured champagne on my pussy while he ate me out. I found my unicorn.
You know it's a pretty bad night when an injured penis is not the worst thing that happened to you. Fuck tequila
I got copblocked.
What?
Cockblocked. By a cop. Copblocked.
Are you texting me while pooping again?
I'm also playing fetch with the dog
Lesbians just stole my cat :(
I'm sorry you had to knock him out on your birthday. But that also means I won the bet that you'd hit someone so you owe me 40. dollars
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