we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
i just taught a 3 year ld how to do a jager bomb, i cant wait to have kids
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
The dentist just giggled when he accidentally shot water across my face, I can sense how he treats women.
you spent the night getting lap dances from a stripper with a c-section scar then ended up at a one room casino by the airport and you say you're too good to blaze and see pirahna 3d? bullshit
It took him three days to realize his roommate had moved out.
please tell me we weren't that bad as freshmen
i can't, we're worse now
I would of joined had I not blacked out last night and ran around naked breaking things till 4 am
HIS BALLS ARE HEAVEN SENT FROM THE VELVET ANGLES.
My roommates said duck dynasty was stupid ... toto i don't believe we're in kansas anymore.
I need a priest, doctor, and therapist after this weekend.
You came walking in the backyard at 10am, in cowboy boots, a new shirt, and had no money,....we lost you for 15 hours....i think you just need a camera crew, or an assistant. IMPRESSED!
When he wakes up tomorrow with half shaved legs smelling like a preteens bathroom, I'm sure he will think he has had a great evening
id like to think im the only pot dealing prostitute that is also an ordained minister. but maybe not. what a time to be alive
It was probably the night you were half naked and trying to blow everybody, guy or girl.
this is me we're talking about here. You're going to have to be more specific than that.
Why did I wake up with a skeleton in my bed? Is it from the lab?
Oh crap, that's where it ended up. Yeah, don't ask.
Randomize
