I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
He could list all of the presidents! Every one, and in order!! I was so impressed the least I could do was give him a blow job.
Ah, yes. Making our founding fathers proud.
as we were stuffing their 24 of beer into our bags you kept saying you wanted cheese strings. closest things we found were kraft singles. as the guys came up the stairs you kept screaming 'GET THE CHEESE! GET THE CHEESE!'
Contrary to what I yelled at them last night, it turns out campus police CAN arrest people...
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
Hey can we break in your window? We need to borrow the dog.
As i was walking home this morning some old lady was walking her dog and i said hello to her as our paths in life met, then i proceeded to puke in someones front yard and never looked back
Exactly. Motivated vaginas are the best kind of vagina
A cute girl just told me she forgot to take her birth control and winked... I've never been so conflicted about fleeing in terror
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
The cat be actin like a 2:30 am poop is the time to tell me all about her thoughts and fears in life. No bitch, this is definitely alone time.
I would go a lot of places to get laid. But I would NOT go to Staten Island.
Positive reinforcement! I'm training him for being a good boy and coming over. He gets sex and cookies.
I never thought I'd be on my couch watching Star Trek, getting my tits rubbed while crying.
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